The Cosmic Orgasm of Life

This week sees your Hostess Claudia looking into and pondering Creation Myths and the general disconnect from the physical body and the act of union/communion.

After a beautiful day out in Wales on Wednesday with Barry Spendlove from Healing Tao Britain, I was left, as usual when out on Barry's walks, in a state of presence and contentedness. Barry is one of the most embodied people I've ever met, and walking with him with his deep knowledge of the land around Wales, nature in general and the physical form, provides a really strong base from which to engage with the interconnectedness of our own bodies and the body of the earth. Observing the deep sunsets, engaging with the trees, with the feeling of Autumn approaching, the earth changing and yet also ever present in stillness, led me to what I can only describe as a state of bliss. This in turn got me thinking about sensuality and sexuality in general, and to wondering how many, if any, creation myths actually involve the physical in a sexual way and what that energy of creation and dissolution is about.

Nature has an exquisite way of mirroring sex. Just observe on your next walk how many trees, plants, flowers and rocks can hold an essence of this most natural act, and yet then consider where we, where the world came from, and how disconnected from the sexual this usually is. Generally we know that the increase in organised religions around the world saw the decrease of shame-free sexual expression. From early natural expressions of sex, amongst mammals and other animals and amongst people, gradually we saw a decline in that naturalness and an increase in judgement and censorship. Over time, we began to hide our sexual drives and to judge them. We became our own inner critics, and the ugly trinity of shame, guilt and fear began to take over from beauty, joy and bliss. Basically - we forgot.

So as I walk in nature and observe everywhere the essence of change, of growth and new life in spring, of decay and release in winter, and the beauty and magic running through all seasons based in that essential re-creation, I am left wondering why so many of our creation stories do not involve the physical expression of that. I found mainly one, a Japanese myth about the God Izanagi and the Goddess Izanami. It is said that these two made love with appetite and with passion, thus giving birth to eight of the Japanese islands.

What eventually happened to Izanami was that when she gave birth to one of her sons, a fire God, this birth was too much for her to bear and the fire consumed her - interesting right? Here is this passionate, sexually confident Goddess and the fire she gives birth to burns her up! So I'm left wondering about all of this cosmic bliss; it's a beautiful thing to feel, to experience and to contain. Orgasmic streaming of the kind that comes from deep, spirit connected, embodied sacred sex is without doubt a potent force for creation. Are we afraid of that energy? Are we shying away from harnessing that life force? Are we overly concerned about the physical aspects of sex when we should be focussing on the energetic ones in their most pure form, and by 'pure'  I don't mean of the kind judged on a moral basis. 

Life is beautiful. Nature is powerful. Sex and sensuality can be a gateway into presence and into bliss. Let's get rid of the distortions around it, open up the dialogue and welcome the great Cosmic Orgasm of Life! 

Leave me your comments on life, energy, nature, sex, creation. I love to engage with people!

Kissing as Communication.

It's been a while since I've written here. January in fact. Since then, my life journey has continued, as it always does, following all manner of changes, twists and turns, each turn more healing, each more revealing than the last.

I am currently on sabbatical from my own healing practice in order to focus on my personal journey towards increasing clarity of what I do, and do not, want in my life. With my mother's passing in May of this year, and the deep grief and shock that went with that, something inside me truly changed. Slowly, over the process of her leaving her physical body, in this plane, I came to accept many things about what it is to be alive, to have the gift of a healthy body, a healthy mind, and the recognition that I had absolute agency for choice in what to do with my life was so strong it was almost more of a drive than a passing thought. "Make the most of life Steph" was all I could hear, over and over. Do not waste time trying to fix things that can't be fixed, instead, lean into the grief, feel it, move through it and let go.

And letting go is not always easy as we know.

Letting go requires courage, faith, hope and trust. It demands stillness and presence. But if we cannot let go, then how can we create space to breathe into new things, new opportunities and new life. When your hands are full of the baggage you're already dragging around with you, there is no room in your heavy arms to carry anything else. Let go. Feel and let go.

Love is one of the hardest things of all to let go. All of those hopes and dreams we shared. All of the visions of growing old together with a whole lot of shared memories, all gone into nothing? But it's never 'nothing' is it? Every person or situation we encounter along the way is an opportunity to learn more about ourselves, and about our personal dreams. If we can share those that's great, if not, then it's time to let go.

So lest we dwell in the place of nostalgia, let's make space for the excitement that comes from really getting to know yourself. Being alone can be a perfect opportunity to tune into our own rhythms, desires, strengths, vulnerabilities and so much more. Being alone is like the compost for the soul. We enter the void and become masters of our own egos. Here I am in the silence and I am uncomfortable, lonely, fearful, angry, or peaceful, blissful, turned on, content. Probably a little of all of those things. At some point the balance has to tip. If not we are stuck in depression, isolation. If we can allow it, we move into the exquisite place of peace and self awareness, and suddenly we find we can see out once more. There are friends there waiting to hold our hand. There are people…and people are interesting if we remain inquisitive enough to want to know more.

And so, as we begin to see the people, we begin to find our curiosity again. Who are you? What do I see in you that must also be in me? You interest me. I am you. You are me. We've had time identifying our true self, our drives and desires and our deepest dreams. We know what we want that little bit more than we did when stuck. There is so much freedom in letting go! Slowly we may find our interest is piqued. Someone smiles, and we return the smile. We begin to feel a fluttering of new possibility and the dance begins all over again, however slowly, however fast. Without the learning, we will most certainly dance the same dance and trip up in the same places. With the right wisdom, we can start to learn new footsteps and new dance routines. 

And then comes the kiss. 

Kissing is an art. But not an art in itself for it is actually a communication. Last night I dreamt about a kiss, a strange kiss, two pairs of lips sealed together but not moving. And in my dream I could hear myself saying "No! Kissing is communication. I want you to communicate with me, respond to my kiss with your kiss. Let your kiss be your silent words, your offering and your response to my kiss, my silent words, my offering." In my dream I knew absolutely and utterly that a truly great kiss is 100% communication and 100% communion. Anything less is an act. Dropping into that place of communion is not always straight forward though, and for me, kissing is one of the greatest tantric acts. To be fully present to the intimacy of another human being and to yourself gives a kiss all that it merits. It is a beautiful thing. And it is communication. 

So let go, let go, let go. Dive deep into life and all it offers you. Whether alone and in between kisses, or together and in the midst of them, let them be wonderful, or let the promise of them be exquisite but waste not your time on kisses that are not reciprocated. Waste not your time on kissing into the wind when the wind could carry your beautiful kisses towards someone waiting to catch them, someone waiting to communicate with their mouth on your mouth, their lips on your lips, their heart present to your heart. That way, even if it is only ever one kiss, one moment, it can never be a lost one.